Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Dads are Different

Lovin' that baby daddy...

Here is a far from exhaustive list of why new dads are very different from new moms.

1. When the baby cries they seem to drift into an even deeper sleep than before. Its like a lullaby for them...

2. When they dress their little baby girls they somehow manage to take a whole closetfull of adorable outfits and combine two of the most unmatched, not meant to go together things to produce a truly original look.

3. They give the mother of the child a heart attack by carrying the baby in one arm, just assuming that the baby is not going to throw herself backward.

4. They give the mother of the baby a heart attack by playing games that the mother wouldn't dream of, such as throwing the baby up in the air in a very un-fun appearing way....and the baby loves it.

5. When they are taking care of the baby they just throw a bunch of toys on the bed and put the kid on the bed in a way that, if the mother did it, would be certain to produce outraged screams...and the baby loves it.

6. They are conveniently at work whenever the baby gets her shots at the doctor's office, so the mom gets to deal with the trauma, and they just get to comfort and cuddle the baby later on when they get home.

7. When the baby poops, they go through an entire package of baby wipes in cleaning her up.

8. While the mother makes a point out of putting a new outfit on her every day, the dad sees no reason, if the outfit isn't visibly soiled, not to put her back in the same clothes from yesterday; sort of the same way that he views his own wardrobe choices.

9. Bottles are left wherever they happen to be when the baby finishes them.

10. Dads prize baby gadgets above all other things and will carry the baby monitor around long after the mom has discovered that, when the baby really means business, she can be heard anywhere in the house without a baby monitor.

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